THE GRACE FO GRIEVING

THE GRACE OF GRIEVING

By: Rev. Arnel Tan

Then Jesus wept. John 11:35 NLT

Seeing the Son of God weeping, grieving for the death of a friend is not only an awesome and mysterious, it’s comforting too others who are grieving too. This is a grace modeled by Christ that gives permission for us to grieve our loss. To express it in tears when words fail to articulate what we feel inside. Tears are language that God understands because He too had to shed it Himself. Grieving is an act of grace simply because it is showing that we are not man and woman of steel, somehow our personalities may differ but inside we are all the same. We are WEAK!

The grieving of Christ as expressed in his weeping models a unique grace of how the One who is willing to grieve is a comfort to others who are grieving and an encouragement to those who refuse to grieve over a loss. It is in this time that His weeping more than his preaching has ministered comfort to many. Some were touched, while others demanded for more spectacular miracles. By the way we don’t weep or grieve to create an impression we grieve and weep to express our humanity and to surrender to God’s sovereignty. Tears per se are not a requirement for repentance yet for those who repent often we find it difficult not to shed tears.

The grieving of Jesus allows us to see not a divine crack or weakness rather a taste of grace that our tears are valued by the Almighty. How opposite from what the world taught us that crying is weakness. Here we learn that the cry of the helpless and the grieving is the beginning of an unsuspected source of strength! In a nutshell, it’s OK to cry! Personally, I am not a stranger to tears, somehow I am beginning to be conscious of it especially when I am preaching. Above the “embarrassment” that weeping brings to a minister the freedom and relief it brings inside is overwhelming. I remember the Psalmist saying “Those who plant in tears will harvest with shouts of joy.” (Psalm 126:5). That’s not just a good stuff to quote that’s a good seed to plant and a harvest to enjoy!

What do you think is the message of “Jesus wept” to you? For me it’s a language of grace that is expressed in grieving. When will grieving end and moving on begin? No one can really tell when the grieving stops. Probably it won’t end in this life. The good news is in every time we grieve God weeps with us and provides grace to finally accept what humanly we can never accept. After some time of intense grieving while doing my afternoon walk at the nearby cemetery (a God given spot to grieve), I found a deep sense of freedom inside, sound of shackles dropping and a fresh song from my heart saying or singing Horacio Spafford’s hymn “it is well with my soul” and this time it’s not just a song you sing in funerals, it’s a song of a soul finally set free! Thank you weeping Savior, thank you for allowing me to weep too, no wonder why You can wipe tears.

GRIEVING

GRIEVING

By: Rev. Arnel Tan

“Then Jesus wept.” John 11:35

I heard Mr. Philip Yancey spoke one time I heard him say we live in a fallen world of pain. I am not sure if I quoted him exactly, but the idea is we are living in a fallen world and pain is something we cannot escape. The things that God created to be good such as marriage, sex and the meaning of life has been perverted by the evil one. Then in the midst of a perfect environment inhabited by perfect people death came by the disobedience of Adam and Eve. Like a domino effect pain became a part of the fallen humanity. Why did Adam and Eve not die as what was said? I can only say that they should have died and all the soul that sinned must die, yet the DELAY OF DEATH is an early preview of the mercy of God.

When pain meets us head on and when it is no longer a theological or psychological topic we slowly understand the meaning why Jesus wept. He modeled to us the grace that is found in grieving. Grieving is an expression of intense sorrow over a loss. Underscore the words intense sorrow; this was the feeling of Jesus when a good friend died. To see Sovereignty grieving is an awesome sight! A lot of mystery wraps the weeping of God. We may not fully understand what this is about, or perhaps this is not meant to be dissected into theological cubes for the consumption of the wise. Maybe this is something God Himself modeled for the hurting and the wounded to cope with life’s loss and eventually move on in grace.

One way or the other we all have experienced a certain degree of loss. Loss of a love one, a pet, a marriage, loss of integrity, loss of a one life time break, or simply put loss of hope. While the experience of having to loose something or someone is universal. There is one important issue that many chose to skip; in fact many chose to bury this ahead over what they have loss. What is it? It’s called the act of GRIEVING OVER THE LOSS.

While God showed us His Son grieving and the Holy Spirit being grieved by our sins and stubbornness, we mortals have brushed it aside.

Don’t you it’s time to take Jesus’ hand and ask Him to grieve with you. Or ask Him to teach you and walk with you in this difficult pathway. More than a therapy or emotional release, grieving opens the door to recovery; bring us to the next step of moving on. Is it true that we don’t want to grieve because we still think we are strong? And we can handle the loss? Grace abounds to the grieving soul; brokenness opens doors of new beginning. Being crushed in the spirit and being in tears somehow brings us to a new day of moving on. Don’t you think you have denied yourself of grace of grieving over the losses in your life? Take the step and ask Jesus He knows everything about grieving. When you say God be merciful it actually conveys the idea of God crying with you.

P.S. If you know someone grieving remember more than words they need a shoulder to cry on and a gracious permission to grieve.

Prayer Mentor

In many humbling and surprising ways the Lord raise the ordinary to do the extraordinary for his glory. My friendship with Alex Gunay i call him tozer started when I was tasked to scout the next station manager for DXKI in marbel south cotabato. The life of Alex represented a model of what God can do to a man who acknowledges his nothingness. I am humbled by his hunger to know God. Unknown to him he became a mentor to me. Inspired by how he wakes up and takes a cold bath and pray in the morning, i find myself doing the same. A simple and yet deep man of faith.

I have no doubt that more awakenings will come out of him as he obeys God into the pastoral ministry. I am an excited child watching in awe what God will do to a man whose desire is to glorify his Lord. He never acted like a mentor nor clamored to be one. In his own simple and honest way he became one to me, and to others that silently watch him.

Each time i take a trip to DXKI part of my excitement is to learn from him and see how God honors those who honor Him. I am prayerful that his roots will grow deep and bear fruit that last. I prayerful that his prayerful life open his eyes to see more of Jesus, and in deep roots and grace filled discernment see things in God's perspective. Though not ordained and non Mdiv yet he became a unassuming mentor to me. His simplicity and kindness is his unique mark of grace and not his competence. In the end of life its the kind that made a difference not the competent.
Thanks Alex tozer gunay

A Reluctant Preacher

it's a rare sunday for me i did not have my regular preaching in our church, believe it's a timely relief. It's not a joke preaching four services on a given sunday. I spoke on the 59th thanksgiving anniversary of Capital Alliance Church in Toril. Rev. Bert Labawan is most gracious to have me preach in their anniversary. It was a wonderful moment of worship and prayer! When the worship leader led us in worship song tears stream down my cheeks. This is something i haven't experience in the past. It's a new sensitivity to God's presence. I think it is this chapter of my life that makes a reluctant preacher out of me.

Reluctant not because of rebellion to God's call but a deep realization of my personal inadequacy and a heavy realization that preaching transcends words, it's a tall order to the preacher himself! How safe just to be in the pew than the man behind the pulpit. It's sacred task that makes you so vulnerable, knowing that your so human. Lord help! Honestly, someone has to do the job so to speak, someone called by God has to stand there and bring sense of God back into the main stream of life. Reluctant because, of the holy expectation that is built within the office of the preacher, reluctant because i know what a graceless heart i have. Reluctant because the job of preaching is a powerful influence to the people who hear. I have more reluctant reasons that cannot put into words for now.

This reluctance makes me seek God in prayer. Every opportunity to stand and preach is a sacred task not to be taken lightly. There is a sense of holy duty to really seek God in earnest prayer if i am the man who will bring God's word. It's a moment that calls to embrace the grace of God as it fearlessly reveal the many ungracious side of my life. Honestly, I think this reluctance leads me not that to seek a podium to pound my thoughts, but to quietly savor lessons for me in my unknown corner. A passion to be a learner than to be a lecturer, a child that need more instruction and only when necessary i wish to open my mouth and quickly hush. This is good for my soul! I pray that i may dig deeper on this a new kind of blessed reluctance.

RELUCTANT PREACHER ANEW

Some thoughts again

It's been some time really since i started to blog my thoughts. Many things happened as in many simple and complicated things. Signs of midlife is one of them. A minister in midlife, believe me it's a tough corner to be in. I guess that midlife madness explains a prolonged silence in my blogging life. Honestly, I find it too complicated to write my feelings. You don't even know where to begin and how it would end. This blog is unplanned believe me. I think we need more unplanned moments to feel that life is not as structured as we have thought or made it to be. Spontaneous moments are refreshing moments reminding us of fresh grace.

Well, i think im slowly, coming back to my normalcy hahhhaha. I have learned the importance of the two choices of life wherever and whatever life may bring you. You either depend or despair. The proud hates the idea of depending on someone, sadly that includes depending on God. No wonder the proud is further caught in a self made rut. Depending on someone is non negotiable, this is one area that choice is not the issue but stubbornness is. From baby's diaper to adult's diaper thats the point, we are not created to be alone, many choose to be alone and lonely. The other choice aside from depend is despair. If we can't depend or won't depend we have chosen despair.

Depend on whom? well I finally learn from what i've been preaching, it is full dependence on God. The word 'surrender" is not just a cliche to me it's a timely word of refuge and rebuke. Fresh and daily surrender to God really makes a whole difference in this life's madness. Humbling and humiliating and yet nourishing the soul, even to blog again.